When Jill Wirth hugs her mother this weekend, it will be the first time the two women have held each other since Jill was given up for adoption shortly after birth 42 years ago.

Jill, a Parma resident and chief cook at Josie’s Country Jukebox, has been searching for her birth mother for two years. She credits the Internet with making her search a success.

For two years, Jill posted what little information she had about herself on various adoption support group sites. She remembers the date exactly – February 13, 2001 – when she awoke to the e-mail message that led to her mother.

The e-mail was from a man who had been looking for his niece, whom his sister had given up for adoption in Rochester 42 years before. His internet search had been on-going for five years when he found Jill.

After exchanging information – Jill knew her birth name had been Julia Ann Stock, that she was born at Strong Memorial Hospital and adopted through the Monroe County Social Services Department – the uncle and niece knew they had a match. A DNA test and a rare genetic neurological disorder confirmed the match.

Jill and her birth mother, Deanna Surita who lives in New Jersey, have been in regular phone contact over the past three months and Memorial Day weekend, Deanna and Jill will be reunited. Sixty year-old Deanna is traveling to Parma, returning to the Rochester area for the first time since moving to New Jersey when her first child was two months old.

Deanna Stock was an unmarried teenager when she gave birth to Julia Ann Stock in 1959. Her parents encouraged her to give the baby up for adoption; two months later Deanna’s father was transferred to New Jersey and the family left the Rochester area.

Julia Ann was adopted by James and Ruth Paffarella of Greece and renamed Jill. The Paffarellas had adopted a boy six years before they were able to adopt Jill. The new baby girl made their family complete.

Jill said her parents were always honest about her and her brother’s adoptions. James is gone now, but 78 year-old Ruth has been a supportive presence in Jill’s search for her birth mother. In fact, Deanna will stay with Ruth during this weekend’s visit. "My mom (Ruth) has always appreciated being given the chance to be my mother," Jill said. "She’s always said she wanted someday to thank my birth mother."

Jill is gaining much more than her birth mother. Deanna married in New Jersey and had nine more children – six daughters and three sons. Besides nine half-siblings, Jill is also gaining 40-some nieces and nephews.

Asked by Jill why she had so many children, Deanna’s response was simple and self-revealing – she kept trying to fill the void she felt at having to give her first born child away. Deanna told Jill she was allowed to hold her baby and feed her while in the hospital. That bonding stayed with Deanna despite the mother-daughter separation.

Deanna has had no contact with Jill’s natural father for 42 years. Jill said she is interested in tracing him, if only for medical information. "When you start looking for your parents, you don’t know what you’ll find," Jill said. She had prepared herself mentally to find a birth mother that wasn’t interested in resuming a relationship. "I never intended to push myself on anyone," Jill said. "But I didn’t want to ignore the possibility that a relationship could be established."

When Deanna arrives this weekend she’ll be accompanied by one of her sons and two of her grandsons. Jill has spoken to her siblings and exchanged pictures. She’s been told she’s built like her maternal grandmother and has her grandmother’s eyes.

"The whole thing is just so exciting for all of us," Jill said. Her two children will have a new grandmother and tons of cousins. Jill has also found out that she has some extended family still in the Rochester area – including a cousin in Chili who is the leader of an adoption support group that has helped Jill. "I’ve been in contact with her," Jill said, "for several months, and now we find out that we’re cousins."

Jill has planned picnics and an outing to the Lilac Festival for the weekend visit. And she intends on taking lots of pictures. The one she is looking forward to most – a picture of her two moms together.

"I sent her (Deanna) a Mother’s Day card for the first time this year," Jill said. "I think it’s just the beginning of us getting to know each other."